Thursday, July 31, 2008

The Brett Favre Saga

Okay, so surely everyone knows what the deal is with the Green Bay Packers and Brett Favre. I really wanted to stay out of it, but now I must intervene since they are my new favorite football team thanks to this guy
So here is the situation like I see it...last season ends and Brett is a bit unsure as to whether he wants to play again. The Packers ask him to tell them ASAP so they can make plans without him if need be, he says ok...and announces he is retired. However, the season rolls around and Favre gets the itch so he says, "man, I'd really like to play again."

So let me get this straight. The best QB ever, who holds more records than Ear X-Tacy, who is coming off a terrific season, who was 2nd in last years MVP voting, made Wrangler jeans cool about a decade longer than they should have been, who is more manly than Chuck Norris, Sean Connery and George Clooney combined, who has never missed a game, and who has given Green Bay everything he had for the past 16 years wants to come back and play again?
This guy wants to play again???
HELL YEAH!

But Green Bay gives this answer..."Ehhhh"

You see the Packers have already told back-up QB Aaron Rodgers that he could play. Oh you mean the guy who has never started an NFL game, who has as many interceptions as touchdowns (ONE!!! which happens to be over 400 less than Favre), and is not even cool enough to try on a pair of Wranglers?

Yeah that guy.

So what does Brett say, Well fine, if I can't play for you guys...why not let me play for someone else? You can trade me or release me or whatever.

But the Packers are not about to do that. They don't want him to play for them...but they sure as hell don't want him to play for someone else.

So, what do they do...they offer Brett Favre 20 MILLION DOLLARS TO STAY RETIRED!!! OH MY GOD!

That is easily the dumbest thing I have ever heard. Do you really think Brett gives a damn about money in the first place? Plus, he's got plenty...trust me! (I use Prilosec and it's not cheap)

Here's the bottom line: The Packers have messed this up. They should have let Brett play, after all he has done for them...they owe him as many seasons as he wants to play. But, they have some kind of love affair with Aaron Rodgers....well fine...let Brett go. He wants to play, let him play!

However, this is a great scenario for me...and a terrible one for Aaron Rodgers. First of all, I have nothing against Rodgers, but he has no way of succeeding. Unless he goes to the Super Bowl this year...the Cheeseheads will be screaming that they should have welcomed Brett back. Every incompletion, every INT is going to be hell for Rodgers...he will be run out of town in 3 years or less...paving the way for the next great Packer QB....
You really messed all this up Green Bay...but luckily you have Mr. Brohm...don't make me get mad at you again...you'll end up in my RAGE CAGE...and trust me, you don't wanna be in my RAGE CAGE...IT'S A GOOD WAY TO DIE!

I need football!

Song of the Day: Nas & Lauryn Hill - If I Ruled The World
Beer of the day: Three Flyods - Alpha King

Wednesday, July 30, 2008

Bad Day

I am in a shitty mood. Pardon my French, but that's just the way it is. I woke up this morning and the whole day I have been pissed at the world. Do you want to know why I'm in such a bad mood? I have no idea. This happens to me about once a month when I don't get enough sleep or I watch one too many episodes of "The Girls Next Door" I just get really angry, and there isn't any explaining it. I am fully aware that I am being a bastard, but there is no hope. I just want to be left alone. In fact, one time I was having a day like this and some kid heard me talking about it and said, "Hey, I know just the song for you today." Before I could threaten him he was like, "Yeah, it's called 'Bad Day' and it goes 'So ya had a bad d..'" before he could finish singing that horrendous line...I was quick to reach my fist through his stomach and rip out his spine. Uggggh.

I have been trying all day to figure out why I'm in a bad mood and here is what I have come up with.

1.) I woke up kinda late, it started to rain just as I was walking from the house to my car, I hit every light on the way to work and it is kinda rainy outside.
- I don't think this is the case because that stuff happens a lot. Plus, I like rainy days.

2.) I'm finally having such terrible sports withdraw that I can't stand it. I mean seriously, I like baseball...but not all the time. Also, I like Brett Favre...but I don't care anymore. I need UofL sports...NOW!
- This could have something to do with it...but I go through this all the time during the summer and it's never been too bad.

3.) People are pissing me off to the point where my brain hurts.
- This is probably it...so now let me explain.

ESPN had this month long event where they had 20 cities and each day they profiled one and showed why it should be America's Titletown. There was Boston, New York, LA, Chicago, and Louisville too (Did you guys vote?). Anyway, all of these towns were worthy competitors, with pro teams, college teams, the derby, muhammed ali, etc. But, after they profiled all the cities they let America vote on it...guess who won? Just guess, seriously....Valdosta, Ga.

WTF?

I mean really? I am a sports geek and I have never even heard of the place. It just goes to show that you really shouldn't let the American public vote for anything. I mean it was bad enough when Reuben Studdard "beat" Clay Aiken (I'm still pissed)...but now this? It's out of control. I'm not even sure the American public should be able to vote for the president...I know democracy, blah, blah, freedom, blah, blah. But, have you met a lot of the people out there? It's bad.

For instance, I went to get my oil changed the other day. I got out of my car, and the guy working there asked my name so he could enter it in the computer. The conversation went like this.

Me: Brian
Oil Man: Last name?
Me: Insert last name
Oil Man: Can you spell that?
Me: U, apostrophe,
Oil Man: ...

(The next full minute is spent with me staring at him as he tries to figure out what language I was using)

Me (after about 90 seconds): It's like a comma in the air.
Oil Man: Oh, ok

(30 more seconds pass)

Me: You can just leave it out and move on to the S.
Oil Man: Ok, that's cool.

I mean really? Have you never used a contraction before? Maybe written a sentence while making something possessive? The best part is that he was the friggin' manager of the place!

DAHHH, I mean it's just amazing...and sad. I know America is a great country...I just don't know how sure I am that they should be able to decide on important things like the President, and Titletown. This is clearly why Project Runway is such a good show. They don't let fools at home decide things about fashion...they let hot woman and gay guys decide...because they are the people who SHOULD decide what is fashionable. Seriously, everyone take note...PR is the shiz!


I'm not totally convinced that this is why I'm in a bad mood...but it will do for now. F'in Valdosta, GA.


Song of the Day: Ben Folds Five - Song for the Dumped
(Best song to listen to on a bad day, but it has bad language...so be careful)

Beer of the Day: Sam Smith - Taddy Porter

Tuesday, July 29, 2008

YouTube...is awesome!

So one of my favorite pastimes is YouTube. I'm sure everyone has gone on to YouTube before and seen a video or two...but I like to go on there and spend like half a day. I like to watch sports and music videos...but my favorite are the ones of people doing really stupid/painful things. I thought I would share a few of my favorites with you today.

This is one my brother sent me yesterday (he likes to waste time on YouTube as well). It is of the world's worst sportscaster in the world... and boom goes the dynamite.

This next one is actually a commercial, but this kid is cute...and hilarious. You know what he did?

Here is a video of a soccer referee in Brazil...let's just say he's very...happy...while at work.

You know what else is funny? Little kids falling down. Not hurting themselves...but just falling.
This kid proves that you should always open your eyes while jumping into a pool.

While this kid, proves you should think twice before going to the snack bar. (Keep your eye on the child who runs past on the bottom of the screen at the beginning.)

Now it's time for a word from our President. Like him or not, he does seem like a fun guy.

Here is a video of a game show in Asia...that's right they're playing matrix ping pong.

And, in case anybody missed it...here is Will Ferrell and John C. Reilly from the ESPY'S

Those videos should keep you busy for a while. I'll post some more of my favorites in the future, because trust me...there are plenty.

Have a good Tuesday folks.

Song of the Day: Toadies - Possum Kingdom
Beer of the Day: Dogfish Head - Indian Brown Ale

Monday, July 28, 2008

Monday afternoon slumber

You wanna know how I know I had an entertaining weekend? Well because I'm sitting at my desk trying everything I can in order to keep my face from falling onto my desk and taking a nap. I mean I'm strug-glin! I'm blowing into my eyes, drinking soft drinks, listening to music and keeping my legs in constant motion...and it's working...barely.

Anyway, my weekend kicked off on Friday when Will and Lautaro came over to have a few drinks before we headed out to dinner. It was good seeing the two of them and catching up and from there we moved on to Cafe Lou Lou's for some dinner, all the while meeting up with Jake, Leslie, Drew, Christanna and some others. The food was good, but the company was better. From there it was back to my house to sit and have some drinks on the deck...all in all it was the perfect way to kick off the weekend.

Saturday proved just as fun as the day was full of pool volleyball...my favorite sport in the world...and the afternoon and night was full of drinking and pizza! We were going to meet up with Jake and them again for dinner...but to help out all of our wallets (especially Lautaro's!) we just ate pizza. In addition to Will, Lautaro and Me...Gera had joined the crew...as did Chris and Todd. After our incredible pizza it was time for cornhole and high-low-red-black...and man did we have fun! Jake, Lesli and crew stopped by later on to hang for a while...but unfortunately they were scared by the beer soaked pizza eating zombies that the rest of us had turned into...they didn't mind too much though!

Sunday came with a final lunch meeting with everyone before we all spread out across the country. It was great seeing everyone again, and while the weekend would have been perfect had Taylor not been in Charleston...it was pretty good I must say.

However, now the feelings are setting in again as school gets closer and closer...more people are leaving. Will is off to Alabama in a few weeks, Gera to Mexico, Jake back to Texico, Leslie to Nashville, Chris to Boston. Everyone to everywhere. It's beginning to set in that the real world is starting and the college days are really over...I don't like it...at all. But, I do have some pretty great places to visit, so I'll make sure to do that...starting with a trip back to Charleston in about a month.

Siiigh, good things come to an end...and this was a good weekend...great to see Will, Jake, Leslie and everyone....especially great to see Todd who I hadn't seen in like 6 months...but sad because I miss Taylor and I will begin to miss all of those leaving to go start their new lives. It is sad, but exciting too for everyone and we'll all get back together soon!

The good news is that I have a plan. If we all get web cams...we can totally still play certain drinking games together and it will be just like we we're back at college. Eh? What do you think?

Siiigh, let it go Brian...just let it go.



On a side note, I saw the new Batman movie...it was awesome....I miss Heath Ledger too!

I'm gonna go now before I fall asleep and lose everything I've typed.

Song of the Day: Ryan Adams - Answering Bell
Beer of the Day: Rogue - Hazelnut Brown Nectar

Friday, July 25, 2008

Knifes, Spoons, Forks and Sporks

So lately I have been having this conversation with a lot of people. Here is how it starts: If you could only have two utensils for the rest of your life...which do you choose? I for one would get rid of the fork and keep my knife and spoon. You can eat anything with a spoon...and you have to chop things sometimes. While people will argue with me from time to time and tell me that the fork is vital (I'm looking at you Wiggo!) I refuse to believe it. I need my spoon and knife and that's all I need! (and I need my remote, and this paddle ball game and my dog...I guess I don't need my dog. (if anyone didn't get that joke...go do yourself a favor and watch "The Jerk" Your life will change.))

Ok, now to my real point. The value of the spork! What the hell happened to these things? Clearly KFC and Taco Bell got the memo...but everyone else missed out. The spork is the real answer to this question. If you had a spork and a knife...that would be perfect. Nevermind the fact that the pricks on a fork are too small to stab anything...if sporks were more abundant everyone would win. But do you want to know why sporks never made it big? I have a theory.

Sporks only come in one material...plastic. They never come in metal, and therefore they will never be accepted as an actual utensil. But the reason why is because Mr. Silverware manufacturer and Mr. Dishwashing soap are good friends. Think about it...if we replaced the spoon and the fork with one utensil...that's half as many utensils everyone would have to wash. Soon, Mr. Dishwashing soap is out of a job and his kids are forced to quit school and join the circus. Luckily for him, Mr. Silverware is quite the family man and he would never do such a thing to such a nice family...therefore...no spork! See it's simple.

Siigh, that was a miserable post. I'm sorry. The only reason I really wanted to talk about sporks was because some friends from college are coming into town tonight...including my old roommate Will...and I had to talk about sporks so I could show this picture:
That's marvelous! I can't help but think this sorry bastard could have kept more spaghetti on his plate with a spork.

Enjoy the weekend kids!

Song of the Day: The Avett Brothers - Pretty Girl From Chile
Beer of the Day: Goose Island 312

Thursday, July 24, 2008

Back in the Day

Last night was a good time for me. Growing up I used to be a sports nut (not unlike today), and I would collect anything and everything I could get my hands on. From baseball cards, to action figures, to jerseys, to bobbleheads, I collected it all. However, my favorite things that I collected were called "Headliners." They were these little figures of sports players with really big heads. Here is one of Emmitt Smith:
Anyway, I found a whole box of these guys last night. I had about 150 of them, and I looked at everyone. To tell you the truth, I kind of forgot that I had them...but looking at each one last night was really a great time. It made me feel like a kid again as I pulled out every tiny basketball, football and baseball player imaginable. As it turns out I owned a wide variety of players...and I even had three Dennis Rodmans each with a different color hair. As I sit here at work today, it has me thinking about what else might be in our storage room from my childhood. What else could I find that would make me smile and feel young again? I dunno, but you can bet I'm gonna look in the next few days. What about you guys out there? Do you have anything stuck in your house somewhere that you used to love but haven't thought about for years? Well I tell ya...go get it! It will be the best thing you have done in quite sometime...I promise!

On a side note...I found some old yearbooks too. I know this may seem lame, but the reason it was so cool is that I found one from 1991, which had the 8th grade pictures of Jim James and Patrick Hallahan, the lead-man and drummer for My Morning Jacket. It was pretty wild to see that these guys that I idolize were just a few years a head of my brother at St. Martha. Also, I learned that Jim was on the basketball B team, ha...too bad they didn't have a school team that judged talent on the ability to melt faces...Jim and Pat would have been the coaches of that squad.

Also, here is a link for all of you to go vote on espn to make Louisville the nation's Titletown! I know you guys aren't all UofL fans or even sports fans...but Louisville is a great sports city even without the Cards. So do this great city a favor and take 2 seconds and vote for the 'Ville. If you plan on using that link and voting for another city...it won't work...I've set it so a giant hand will come out of your computer and slap you in the face instead...trust me I know technology...I have my very own blog after all!

Until tomorrow children!

Song of the Day: Better Than Ezra - Good
Beer of the Day: BBC - Altbier (I think it's actually called like Amber beer now...but that's crap it's Altbier...everyone knows it)

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Blogs are a great way to waste time...and laugh.

So blogs are kind of lame...you know that obviously if you are reading this. However, there are a few blogs that I frequent and obviously I am a blogger myself. Blogs are always good for a laugh and they are a good way to pass time when just sitting around a computer. I know some people think...why should I listen to this person or care what they have to say? Just because he/she has a blog doesn't mean they know anything. Well, yes...but that's the point of blogs. Trust me I've read 20 crappy blogs per every good blog I have read...but the good ones are just fun to read because it is just some random person who is talking to whoever...about god knows what....and that's why I am proud to be an American.

Ok then, I read a ton of blogs, but I won't overload you with all of them today...I'll give you some today to check out and then some at a later date...that way I won't overload you. And also, you won't see all these other amazing blogs and then stop reading mine. So here we go.

1000 Awesome Things

This blog is by a guy who is just coming up with one awesome thing for 1,000 weekdays in a row. Each day a new post...each day a new awesome thing. Here are some of my favorites:
#996 - Opening and sniffing a can of tennis balls.
#993 - Fat Major League Baseball Players
#980 - Old, Dangerous Playground Equipment

Michael Ian Black
Yup this is the VH1 whore who is really only famous for being on the "I love the 80's, 90's, etc" shows...and also he was on the TV show "Ed" which was a great show. Anyway, he is not really famous...but he's really funny and weird.

Mike Birbiglia's Secret Public Journal
This guy is easily the funniest stand up comedian on the planet. This is his journal online and he talks about all sorts of ridiculous things. If you can ever catch one of his specials on Comedy Central...tape it...because you can watch it 100 times and it is always funny. Plus, his Wiffle Ball Tony joke about President Bush is one of the funniest jokes ever. (The video just has sound...but it's the best rendition)

Stuff White People Like
This is another one like the 1,000 things blog. It basically is just a list of a bunch of things white people like. My favorites: Facebook applications, sweaters, unpaid internships, standing still at concerts, assists and Barack Obama.


Ok, those blogs should keep you busy for the next week and a halfish...so enjoy them!

Also, an update on Operation Dump Becky 3.0. Not only did I exercise last night, I also tried out a Wii Fit (which is totally awesome) and found out that I am normal weight for my age and height. YEEEES!!! Screw this exercise thing! Just kidding. Although I have now moved my goal from losing 15 pounds to only losing 12 by October 1! Plus I was only normal by about.125. Which means I don't have a lot of room to maneuver...So, I'll continue to try and get rid of Ol' Becky!

Song of the Day: Lupe Fiasco - Hip Hop Saved My Life
Beer of the day: Brooklyn Brown Ale

P.S. If you live in the greater Louisville area...go outside right now if you haven't yet today. It is simply gorgeous outside. Sunny, Breezy and NO HUMIDITY!!! WOO-HOO!

Tuesday, July 22, 2008

Tuesday's long post...

since I let everyone down the last 10 days or so!

I was going to recap my trip to the beach in full detail...but let's be honest, that would just be mean. It was bad enough that I got to go to the beach, but then I didn't even keep in touch with you guys...so for me to brag about how nice it was to be on the beach...well that would just be poor form.

So instead I'm just going to try and talk about other things that have popped into my head the last few days.

* The ESPYS. Please tell me you watched them. This is by far the world's greatest award show. Not only is it about sports, it's full of great stuff...the show always makes you laugh, cry and shake your head at why Francisco Garcia and Brian Brohm don't win the majority of the awards. Also, they always find a way to give Will Ferrell an award. However, this year I was a bit scared because they gave the hosting duties to Justin Timberlake. Now I don't really hate the guy, but it seemed an unusual choice and I was scared it would be stale. Well I was wrong. He was great, funny and entertaining. Also, Greg Oden is the funniest/coolest basketball player alive. It was great year in sports and the show proved to be just as amazing. Try to catch it if they air it again.

* Remember that mystery e-mail I got from the eBay guy? Well he actually sent me the jersey! However, when I got it the package was marked "Baby Shirt" several times on the outside. So I thought I was in for a nice mini jersey. Turns out it is a normal man size jersey...minus the sleeves which are a little tight. So yeah, it turns out that Nan Tharat is a stand up guy who did not sin after all. I am a bit disappointed that he didn't send himself with the jersey as promised...but oh well. Now I just have to loose some of my ginormous arm muscle in order to make my Liverpool jersey fit!

* So the Derrick Caracter saga has a new twist. Turns out that if he pays his own way to school, finds a new place to live, works out daily and finds a job for the next year...he can play basketball the next year for UofL. I'm not a betting man, but if I were I would bet my house on the side that says he won't ever wear a UofL jersey ever again. But, please DC...prove me wrong...I don't even have my own house and when you try you're a monster!

* As you might expect the loneliness of Taylor leaving is sure to set in big time this week. However, Jake is making a trek from Texico to Kentucky and he's bringing Leslie with him...which also means Will is coming in to see them too! It should make for a great weekend, and it will keep me off of bender status for at least a little while longer.

* Everyone knows I'm a UofL fan...and I don't care too much for UK. Now, I realize that there are some intelligent UK fans and their are some ignorant UofL fans...but in my lifetime I have met about 10 times as many ignorant UK fans than UofL fans...although with people continuing to badmouth UofL football...it makes the number creep closer to even everyday (NOTE TO ALL WHINY UofL FOOTBALL FANS: SHUT UP! This is our team so start supporting them or go root for someone else. The Coach, players, AD and school do not owe you anything...so root with pride win or lose and stop making us all look like jackasses). Ok back to my whole point about UK fans and how they never cease to amaze me. At the beach we hung a UofL flag from our house. Everyone there was UofL fans and all we did was just hang our flag to show our pride for the school and the city. However, one day I looked out the window and noticed a nice message written in the sand that read, "Louisville SUCKS! GO CATS!" That's marvelous. I mean if you feel it necessary to do that...well way to have the stones to do it when no one was around...and way to be creative. I mean even the lousy "We have 7 championships" is a little better than that. So to sum up my point...UK fans continue to show that even out of state they are creative, amazing, clever geniuses. (Sorry to the UK fans who read this blog...I love all of you...except Todd because he's a turncoat...and I love him too...but it's still a shame and I have to mention it every time I can)

* I got a haircut, and let me tell you...I hate haircuts! I'd get in to it and tell you why...but it would take much too long. Just know that I do and one day when I don't have anything else to talk about...I'll tell you all about it. I do look sexy though!

*52 fans now with the addition of my aunt Sherry.

* So now that I'm back from vacation I have to start Operation Dump Becky 3.0! For those that don't know...Becky is the yeast baby that has been growing in my belly since I started college. She is pretty large these days and because of her...some of my pants don't fit as well as they used to and my athletic ability is dwindling...so I'm gonna get rid of her. (I call it Operation Dump Becky 3.0 because operations 1.0 and 2.0 failed miserably...mainly because I kinda like Becky and she's so damn cuddly...but it's time for her to go now!) Now, I'm not going to do something crazy like stop drinking or stop eating Taco Bell. Instead, I am just going to drink less, eat less and do at least one hour of activity every single day. That could be jogging, it could be swimming or playing tennis or basketball...but everyday I'm going to do it. My goal is to lose 15 pounds by October 1st. I'll keep you updated on my progress...wish me luck.

* Being at work the day after vacation is nothing if not lousy. I need a beach chair and a beer in a hurry! Sigh.

Beer of the Day: Abita - Turbo Dog
Song of the Day: Thin Lizzy - Dancing in the Moonlight (It's Caught Me in It's Spotlight)

Did you miss me???

So yeah, I stayed an extra day. But the beach was great and seeing Taylor was obviously wonderful! I'm sorry I was unable to post while gone...but drinking and sitting/napping on the beach is not easy...well yes it is...but it makes it hard to get my blog on. Anyway, the trip was good and while I'm sad to be away from my lady...it's always nice to come back home. More tomorrow people. And by tomorrow I mean in a few hours after I sleep. Goodnight!

Thursday, July 10, 2008

Whoa...what's the date on that milk?

Happy Thursday kids! It's time once again for me to try and get a word that I made up used by other people. First of all, how many of you have used Beardo? No one? Well, I still like it...but maybe that's because I'm a weirdo (see what I did there?)

Anyway, today's word is
STANKAFOODAPHOBIA. Pronounced just like it looks Stank-a-food-a-phobia. This is something that I suffer from every single day. It is very serious condition and there are dozens of us suffering from it everyday...DOZENS!

So here is the definition. To make it simple, stankafoodaphobia is the fear of spoiled or stale food. For instance, if you don't drink milk without smelling it first, or if you don't drink milk once the sell by date has passed...then you might have a mild case of stankafoodaphobia. Also, if you simply pass up delicious food on a regular basis because it has a .001% chance of having gone bad....then you are stankafoodaphobic. Get it?

Let's use it in a sentence or two...

1.) No thanks Jeff, I'll pass on the Sun Chips...they're passed the date and I am stankafoodaphobic!

2.) I can't believe you won't eat some of this delicious cheese, what are you a moron?
- - "No, I just suffer from stankafoodaphobia."

Give it a try...you might even know a stankafoodaphobic yourself...or even worse...YOU might be one.

***LIFE OF BRIAN ALERT***
I'll be going out of town tomorrow for a week of fun and sun in South Carolina. I'll get to see Taylor, sit on the beach and drink lots of beer...I'll probably have to wear pants though since I'm going with her family and friends! (But maybe I can convince everyone that you're not truly on vacation until your pants less? Hmmmm.) It's going to be great though!! However, daily blog entries will probably not happen...but I'll try to post at least a few times while I'm gone...I know you guys will miss me, but try to be brave.

To make this trip more interesting, I am riding down with Taylor's Dad, Jim. It should be some really sweet male bonding time and I think that it's safe to say that once the 10 hour trip is done...Jim and I will either be best friends, or I won't be dating his daughter anymore. Here's hoping it's the first one! Wish me luck.

Song of the Day: James Taylor - Carolina in My Mind
Beer of the Day: Palmetto Brewing Co. - Palmetto Amber

*Pssst...check it out over there to the left...51 fans! Welcome aboard Chris!

Wednesday, July 09, 2008

eBay problem

I am a frequent eBayer. I love to buy stuff off of that site because when it comes in the mail I feel like it is a mini Christmas morning. Plus, you can find all sorts of stuff...just go on there sometime and type in random things, you'll find some crazy things. However, the down side of eBay is that your are doing business with people that are all over the world. Sometimes the item is not as you expected and sometimes you end up with no item at all. Well I am in a pretty weird situation right now...

About a week ago I ordered a soccer jersey on eBay. I have bought soccer jerseys on their before and they have always turned out perfect...and they have always been much cheaper than if I had bought the item from an official team store or something. The problem is that they ship from like Taiwan and other far away lands across the globe. Well after I paid for my jersey with PayPal (an awesome tool) about a day later I got an e-mail from eBay informing me that the seller's account had been discontinued, and I should contact PayPal about getting my money back. But, within five minutes of that e-mail....I get this gem from Nan Tharat, the seller of the item.

"Dear Sir

My store had been suspended from Ebay But you don't mind ,I will be sent item to you. Please don't claim with PAYPAY, I confirm to you ,I real send to you because I have Ethic and I don't want to sin. I promise.

Thanks very much"


Exsqueeze me? Baking powder?

My first instinct was to laugh...a lot. My next instinct was to be a little sad because I may not get my sweet jersey...but then I thought, "hey this guy not only told me he was ethical, he also told me that he didn't want to sin...and he told me I didn't mind." So I decided to write him back and ask him when I should expect my jersey...that way if I didn't get it by that time or a few days after I would just call "PayPay"
His response:
"I confirm, I will be sent to you .Thanks very much"

My reaction...Sweet! Now I get a free middle eastern guy sent to me...along with the jersey!

So here is the moral of the story. I'm gonna give this guy the benefit of the doubt and say that he is going to send my jersey...or hand deliver it...but I trust that I will get it. But also, while I laughed a bit at this man's attempt to write an e-mail to me...I also have to applaud him. God knows if I tried to write him in his language I'd probably tell him things a lot worse than that he didn't mind that I was going to be sent to him so I didn't sin!

Siiiigh, I'm totally out thirty bucks aren't I?

Oh well, that's what makes eBay a special experience each and every time!

Song of the Day: Band of Horses - No One's Gonna Love You
Beer of the Day: Terrapin Rye Pale Ale

P.S. A special thanks to Leslie for giving me some help with my boot mission...I still haven't found the perfect pair...but she is totally helping and pointing me in the right direction!

Tuesday, July 08, 2008

50 Fan Thank You

Ok, so we made the fifty fans by the fourth goal...so now there are a few things we need to do.

1.) I just want to give a big THANK YOU to all of you who joined, and all of you who encouraged your friends to join. I keep saying that this blog is bigger than just one or two people...and it is!
Here is perk number one of being a "Life of Brian" fan. Since we have a decent size following, and it is a pretty diverse group with a wide range of location and age, this is a resource that everyone should use. If you ever have a problem or need some guidance in some way just let me know and I'll mention it on here...and if you ever see someone in need of something and you know how to help them out...then just let me know and the proper advice will be given to the person in need. It could be something serious like...I need a new car, what do people recommend. Or something as small as, "so and so is going to Austin, Texas...does anyone know anything exciting to do there?" Get it? I'll start it off by seeing if maybe someone can help me with one of my problems...

I want a pair of brown casual boots that I can wear to work with jeans. Not cowboy boots, not work boots, not motorcycle boots and not hiking boots...I really would like them to look something like this.
I've looked all over and I can't find them...does anyone have any suggestions?

See, now we have at least 50 people who are thinking if they know where to get some kick-ass boots! 50 minds scattered in age, across the nation are a lot more productive than just one...so if you need something or have a question...just let me know and I'll post about it. Don't be shy.

2.) Still encourage people to read this blog! Just because we reached our 50 doesn't mean we should stop there. Why not get 100 fans by Halloween? I would say sooner but I only know 27 people so the fact that I have 50 fans is a minor miracle! So yeah, keep spreading the word.

3.) Now what you guys have all been waiting for...the official prize/celebration for reaching our goal of 50 fans by the fourth! All I said was that it would involve beer and not pants! Sooooo, you lucky 50 with your names over there from Mom to Catherine are entitled to one beer bought for you by me (max value $5). That means sometime in your life...you can redeem your prize. If we are sitting at a party together and I have a six pack of something and you are thirsty...then I will give you one and fulfill your reward. If we are at a bar, I'll buy you each one beer. So, one way or another...one drink is on me (If you don't like beer...or aren't of age...we'll discuss something). As far as the pants go, well when we have said drink it's your choice as to whether or not we wear pants or not while drinking...or I guess it may ultimatley be up to the manager of the bar. So anyway, you got that going for ya.

Ok, that's all really...I gotta get back to work...what do you think I do write blog entries all day?

Song of the Day: George Harrison - Behind That Locked Door
Beer of the Day: New Holland - Full Circle

Monday, July 07, 2008

Weekend Update

Let me start by saying that...

WE REACHED 50 FANS!!! I apologize for not posting sooner, I know you were all on pins and needles, but I was too busy decorating my pontoon for the annual Doe Valley 4th of July boat decorating contest to post (that's a lie, I haven't done that since I was 8, but if I did, it would totally include superman and batman like this one).
But anyway, Catherine sent me a Facebook message around noon on Thursday making her the 50th fan by the 4th! We did it! I'm proud of every single one of you guys...you kept your heads on a swivel and that's what you have to do when you find yourself in a vicious cockfight! Tomorrow I will include full details on the celebration/benefits of being one of the first 50 members of the fan club.

So this weekend was action packed full of things. Let's start with the sad part. Yes, Taylor moved to Charleston on Saturday. I bet your wondering why I'm out of bed and not in a puddle of my own tears...well, it's because I am going on vacation on Friday and I'll be able to see Taylor. So I'm holding myself together until then...but, when I get back my lifestyle will most likely resemble Ron Burgundy's after he gets fired in Anchorman...
It won't be pretty, but at least it's not for a little while longer.

Ok, my holiday weekend also included some happy times:
-Going to the track and losing 30 bucks...but getting a tour from a hilarious man in a jockey costume, which made it all worth while.

- Starting the Louisville "Urban Bourbon tour" with mom and Ben by going to Bourbon's Bistro...delicious and awesome. 7 more stops before we get some free bourbon gifts!

- Getting a ton of business accomplished so I can soon be a millionaire.

- Enjoying a nice 4th of July cookout!

- Making a mix CD of all classic American Bands.

- Dominating the "Rock Band" vocals on "Black Hole Sun" and "Sabatoge" while scaring Ryan and Lauren at the same time.

It was a full weekend...but a lot got accomplished, including getting our 50 fans!!! Wooo!

Song of the Day: Neil Young - Heart of Gold
Beer of the Day: Left Hand - Sawtooth Ale

Thursday, July 03, 2008

God Bless America!

Alright people, since this is probably my last post until after the holiday weekend (since I'll be much too busy being depressed while Taylor leaves, and singing Lee Greenwood's "Proud to be an American" at the top of my lungs!)I thought I would talk a little bit about the good ol' United States of America and why we are the best country in the world.

Let me start by saying that I am proud to be an American, and while I may have a better shot at naming the exact track list of all 13 Beatles' albums than naming half of the amendments to the constitution, I think I am a pretty good American as well. With that said, I'm just going to list a few of my favorite things about America and tell you why they make me proud to be an American. Here we go!

1.) Cook Outs. Only in America do people of all class and race come together over a grill to celebrate glorious foods such as hot dogs, light beer, mac and cheese, baked beans, potato salad, etc. There are few things in the world as enjoyable as a summertime cookout...and you can only attend one in America (well I've never attended one in another country...how about you?)

2.) The Star Spangled Banner. Never has one song produced such powerful, proud moments...and such embarrassing and ridiculous moments as well. I went to youtube and typed in the song and here is the highest of highs and the lowest of lows for this song. This is a beautiful version by Marvin Gaye (who could probably be a reason to love America by himself)...beautiful!
Here is a rather sad version...and by sad I mean hilarious. I appreciate cops and all that they do, but they should stick to protecting the public...yikes!

3.) Hooters. Now before you think I'm a pervert...let me 'splain. I was actually at a Hooters last night after I went to Taylor's dad's softball game...and I really dislike a.) being there and b.) their food. But a Hooters restaurant in Indiana is the only place that I could have heard these two things said last night. The first is when I went to use the bathroom and there were two guys peeing next to each other and arguing about something...here's how it went down.
Drunk Guy #1: Don't you talk to me like that you piece of s***t!
Drunk Guy #2: Man shut up, you're Ruckin Fratarded! Wait no...you're Ruckin Retarded...No.. wait..
Drunk Guy #1: We're both Ruckin' Drunk I know that! Heeeee Hawwww!
They spend the rest of the time in the bathroom giggling like school girls and undoubtedly urinating on themselves and maybe each other. It was special.

The second comment I heard was this..."I was talking to a lady at my bible study who said the Sex and the City movie was terrific. " Classic. There isn't much you can do but smile at this comment...mainly because it was said as if the Sex and the City movie was sinful...which it might be.

4.) This guy:Nice right. Well that's actually my brother's friend Matt. But the simple fact that everyone probably thought that was just a normal guy, and the fact that Matt was funny/creative enough to dress up like that...well that makes me love America! Man...he must work out.

6.) Football. No not that crappy sport where they kick the ball around with their feet. I'm talking about the Football where they throw the ball and touch it all the time and try to tackle each other. I love the tailgating aspect, the over enthused fan aspect and well...I just love it all. For the record I also really like the other "football" but there is nothing American about that.

7.) Baseball. This is just America's game...minus all the foreign players. I love baseball and to tell you the truth I really don't care who is on/was on steroids. If both the pitchers and the hitters are using them...well then...game on! Kids, Drugs are bad...ummmkay!

8.) Manifest Destiny. Drink it in...It always goes down smooth!

9.) Our history. It may not be as old or as impressive as some other countries. But go to Washington D.C. sometime and tell me you don't feel proud, honored and blessed to be an American...I triple dog dare you.

10.) Freedom. Really freedom is awesome. Just think about it. Freedom allows us to do, pretty much whatever we want...minus anything against the law. My favorite part of freedom is freedom of speech...which has allowed me to create this blog and get 49 FANS!!! That's right, we had a record day yesterday with additions from: Erin, Bernie, Danni, Megan, Patrick, Andi, Kim, Julie, Scott, Jennie, Christanna, Brenda and another Kim! One more by tomorrow...it's actually going to happen...and that's why I am proud to be an American!

Happy 4th of July people....have a great weekend.

Song of the day/weekend: Jimi Hendrix - The Star Spangled Banner
Beer of the day/weekend: Pabst Blue Ribbon

Wednesday, July 02, 2008

Things to consider while realizing that big (illegal) fireworks are a really really bad idea

Apparently some kids set off an entire pack and blew up their garage...I'm just saying, that wouldn't have happened if they just used sparklers, black snakes and those little twisty tanks! This guy knows what I'm talking about!
* I bought two new cds yesterday: The Helio Sequence - Keep your Eyes Ahead...and...Wolf Parade - At Mount Zoomer. My first impressions...meh. They aren't bad...but neither seem to have the ability to make me want to throw my life away by becoming a famous rock star (groupie).
On a really sad note, I had a music casualty yesterday as my My Morning Jacket Okonokos Disc 2 has a scar on it and can't play without skipping for more than 15 seconds. Not even three hours worth of tears yesterday was enough for it to be fixed...oh well.

* We had a Brouha beer tasting last night. We tried 9 different wheat beers and ranked them for taste, aroma, appearance and overall impression. I learned three things...1.) blind taste tests are tricky, 2.) The last few beers were a whole lot better than the earlier ones... weird, 3.) If I can't rank a beer strictly based on mouth-feel, then I have no business living anymore.

* It is a very very big day for me today. No not because it's hump day...this day only comes once a year....that's right...they updated the new Louisville Basketball roster! That means I get to know what number all the new players will be wearing (What a loser)! Samardo Samuels - 24, Terrance Jennings - 23!...It should also be noted that no new player chose 32, making it possible for Derrick Caracter to return! (Cue footage of me banging my head on my desk!)

* Time for the all important fan update! Just when it looked like we were in for the fight of our lives, the fan club picked up big numbers in the last 24 hours! Bringing in 6 new fans! Big welcome to Ben, Ryan, Dude, Drew, Kevin and John! Thanks for coming around gang! That means with all of today left, all Thursday and then till midnight on Friday...we need only 14 fans! It's still a lot, but we can do it!

* Now for your humor for the day. This is a video my Dad came across...and it's just so sad. We all know a guy like this, someone who just doesn't know when to stop, or count how old he is. It's just sad...but also really really funny.

One more day till the weekend...well not counting today, if I'm out of bed and at work I can go ahead and check that day off the list...WOOOO!!!

Song of the Day: Youth Group - Lillian Lies
Beer of the Day: Blue Moon (apparently I kinda like this beer...damn taste tests)

Tuesday, July 01, 2008

Reminiscing over some Kool Aid

It's easy to see that lately I have been fighting off growing up. However, there are some good things about growing up...having money, early bird specials and complaining about teenagers and how ridiculous it is that they go to the movies to just hang out...those rascals! Anyway, the best thing about getting a little older is being able to reminisce about things in your past.

For me there are certain things that just trigger a memory and put me back into a particular place or time, I'm sure there are several for you too. It could be a smell, a song, or a food...but when you hear it, smell it or taste it again...it takes you right back to your past. Well in the past two days I have relived two vivid moments of my adolescence, caused by a song and a drink.

Last night...for the first time in years I made some Kool-Aid. But, it wasn't just any kind of Kool-Aid, it was the best kind...Ice Blue Raspberry Lemonade! I don't know if you have ever tried this...but if you haven't get ready to live. First of all it is electric blue in color, so you know it's good! I took a sip last night and I immediately was reminded of summers when I was in grade school...which happen to be some of the best days of my life. Here is a typical day from Brian's summer vacation 1998.
11:00 - wake up, watch sportscenter 2 times, eat 3 bowls of corn pops.
1:00 - Call as many people as I knew that were within bike riding distance of my house and tell them to meet up at the park...and bring tennis balls if they had them
1:30 - Meet friends up at park and play sandlot baseball until dinner time (If we were rained out we would just go back to my house and play Ken Griffey Jr. Baseball on Super Nintendo! I often preferred a rain out!)
5:30 - Drink an entire pitcher of Ice Blue Raspberry Lemonade Kool-Aid!
6:00 - Eat Dinner and convince my Mom to either let me stay over at a friend's house...but more than likely let 5 or more friends stay at our house (I was always pretty scared to spend the night).
7:00 - Get the OK from Mom after promising that nothing will get broken and certain chores will be done (For the record, those chores were often done...but by my friends after I won some money off of them by beating them in horse. They would just choose to trim the shrubs instead of paying me 5 bucks! Boo-Yah!)
8:00 - Friends come over, we swim and play Nintendo until midnight when we fall asleep and begin our cycle all over again in the morning.

Man, those were the days! College might have been a better time in my life...but in College you had to worry about grades and such, those days of summer were innocent and worry free. Actually the only worry was whether or not Mark McGwire and Sammy Sosa would hit 62 home runs...now if anyone hits over 40 they are totally on steroids. 1998 was such a more simple time...and thanks to that magical blue Kool-Aid, I can re-live it every once in a while.

The other blast from the past I experienced the other night was when I played the song "The General" by Dispatch. Whenever this song comes on I think of being 16 years old and visiting my brother at College. It was here that my life changed and I learned about "real" fun. You see life is supposed to be fun, it's not a competition...it's fun for all...and if you play right everyone wins. Here Ben and his friends showed me exactly what college was about. Standing on couches, singing into broom sticks (tennis rackets, baseball bats, golf clubs and umbrellas work too), drinking when you're not supposed to, staying up until it is daylight outside and singing songs at the top of your lungs with your best friends...and a few strangers. If I didn't do that while I was in college...I would not have graduated...and I certainly wouldn't be trying to open a bar!

What things remind you of your past? For me it's Kool-Aid and Dispatch, among many others. It's so nice to remember these things and experience them again and go back to a time in your life. However, if you discover something that makes you think of the past, like a song, and soon you find yourself alone in the dark listening to "Careless Whisper" on repeat and crying because you miss your high school sweetheart so badly...well then reminiscing has back fired on you and if it lasts more than three hours...you should consult a physician immediately.

***Fan alert
With 4 days to go...we are now at 30! Additions today include Melissa, Helen, Michele and Jeanne! It's gonna happen people...and when it does...WATCHOUTNOW!

Enjoy the opening of July everybody!

Song of the Day: My Morning Jacket - Lay Low
Beer of the Day: Dogfish Head - Festina Peche