Monday, March 09, 2009

Brian's 1st annual 'Micro-Mini-Marathon"

So I'm not running the mini-marathon. I set out to accomplish a task...and I failed. I announced on here that I was going to do it and I made everyone of you believe...and now I'm breaking your hearts by telling you that it's not gonna happen. I fought for a long time...but when it comes down to it...there were lots of factors that led to my early retirement from professional running. Here are the factors

1.) I missed the early entry so now it will cost me $65 to sign up for the race.

2.) It's a 13.1 mile race. I don't know why I thought that seemed reasonable.

3.) Running sucks. I mean you're just running...that's it.

4.) The 65 bucks don't even go to a good cause (I don't think)

5.) In the past month 4 different people have mentioned that I look slimmer then the last time I saw them...Becky is on her way out...which was the original goal in the first place.

As you can see, the Mini-Marathon is not for me...I think only Ninjas compete in that thing. So that's why I have decided to make my own marathon event. I felt bad about not coming through on a goal I had set for now I'm making it up to all of us.

I'd like to announce that on Saturday April 25th, 2009...The 1st ever Micro-Mini-Marathon will take place in Louisville, KY.

Now, in order to make this thing a success...I need all of you out there to join are the details.

1.) This is a 3.1 mile marathon. I know 13.1 is impressive...but for normal people like me (non-ninjas), let's just knock it down to 3.1...because 13 is unlucky anyway.

2.) The race will start in Cherokee park and either end at my apartment for a cookout...or at O'Shea's Pub for a victory party. It's all going to depend on the number of participants (and whether or not O'Shea's will help us out)

3.) It will cost 5 dollars to participate. This 5 bucks will go to a charity to be named later. I'm going to give it to a real charity...I just haven't found the right one yet. Also, people are strongly encouraged to give more...but we all know times are tough.

4.) Here's the catch. You can run or walk the 3.1 miles...but you can't JUST run or walk. You must be doing something else while moving. For instance, you can dribble a basketball, yo-yo, run backwards, cartwheel or just dance the whole way. A prize will be awarded for the most creative way to complete the marathon. Also, those who just want to run or walk may do so...but will be subject to harsh criticism and finger wagging the entire 3.1 miles. Anything besides plain running or walking will do...the only stipulation is that your activity cannot involve wheels of any kind. No bikes, skates, segways, cars, etc. Get it?

Now then, I'm sure that I'll be contacting most of you personally to participate in the first ever Micro-Mini-Marathon...but if you want to go ahead and sign up (save me some trouble)...please contact me in any way...e-mail, blog comment, phone call, Morse code, etc. Once I get a feel for how many people are interested, I'll make some decisions and post more details on the race.

So for those of you who always thought about running the mini-marathon...but decided that it just wasn't gonna happen because it was too long and it costs too much money...well please join me on April 25th as we accomplish a marathon of our own and help out a good cause (to be named soon) in the process.

Who's with me?

Song of the Day: The Contours - Do You Love Me (Now That I Can Dance)
Beer of the Day: Pilsner Urquell

1 comment:

Benjamin said...

Hey, I don't know if you've seen this site or not, but you should go to You can map out a path and it will tell you how long it is. If you're looking for a 3.1 mile route, you can plan it all out there.

By the way, this is a great idea and you should promote the hell out of it. I'll tell people in law school if you want.